The Dating Pool - Are You Swimming Yet

by Pool Builders on 02-06-2007 in Articles

Relationship...for some that word stirs up fears of commitment and for others it conjures up the idea of ever lasting love. For many on the dating scene "ever lasting love" is their ultimate goal but how do you find someone to go on a date with and once you do how do you go from date to relationship?

Start Out Small & Slow

While the person you're dating may be looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right, they may not be looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right now, meaning pull in the reins and go a little slower. But let's start at the beginning instead of jumping straight to the finish line. Let's get back to the basics.

To get back to basics, let's start with a history lesson. Dating can be a scene right out of your high school memory banks. Many are haunted by memories of their first date and the nervous tension that resulted from the anticipation of it: "Did I pick the correct outfit?" "Will I smell good to them?" "Is my breath okay?" "What will I say during those awkward moments of silence?"

Things haven't changed that much since high school. Often the same questions come to mind and you will still get that same sense of nervous anticipation before embarking on a first date with someone.

Dating can be a very intimidating time to even the most experienced and savvy dater. Recently I asked both men and women who dated frequently (3-4 times a week on average) if they still got first date jitters. The same answer echoed through 93% and that was a resounding, "Yes!"

Amazingly enough, even those people who seemed confident and poised; those who seemed to have an endless amount of dating potential as well as a line of prospective suitors, still got first date jitters. So for those singles that still have troubling memories of their past dating experiences, how do you jump into the dating pool and begin to swim again?

Unlike swimming in a pool filled with water, don't dive into the deep end of the dating pool first, even if you remember how to swim. There may be sharks lurking waiting to attack. It's always best if you begin in the shallow end of the pool. Start out small by meeting people in groups at functions until you feel comfortable enough to seek out a dating partner. After that hurdle is crossed then by all means dive right in to the dating pool!

Finding People to Meet

Where can you find a dating pool in your area? Because many people have a select group of friends, they tend to see the same people at all of the functions, B-B-Q's, parties and other events. Same faces with the same stories that become all too familiar. So where do you meet compatible and available singles? Here are a few suggestions:

  • Find charity events in your area and attend them.
  • Look in your local paper for events that singles would go to. Social functions, chess café's, ice cream socials, etc.
  • Find sporting clubs. (The kind of clubs that actually have participation such as water or snow skiing trips.)
  • Take a specialty course at a junior college or community center.
  • Go to your local coffee café and sit on the comfortable chairs that are in the round to make conversation more likely.
  • Check out reputable online dating services.

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